End Suffering on Evasion

by Judith Anderson

     We suffer from evading the challenges of life that must be faced if we are to grow spiritually.
     This is true in simple practical matters, such as when avoiding making that call or fixing something on the car or in the household or business, where laziness or procrastination are always waiting to sabotage us. But let's look at the serious psychological consequences of evasions, of not doing what is right and necessary to develop.
     One basic instruction is to study evil and wrongness, whether in the world or in ourselves. Self-facing can't be avoided. We must bravely see ourselves as we actually are, not as we imagine we are.
     Have you seen yet how you'll do almost anything else to distract yourself from just sitting and doing nothing but watch? We "escape to the nearest comfort" in an effort to avoid just quietly looking within. We're "always pushing the present moment away," as someone said recently in a class, as if the enemy is in the Now rather than in the mind which drives us to run and hide.
     This running away never solves anything; it perpetuates problems. Vernon once likened it to regression, running back to play with your toys like a little child. If we evade for too long, we may become "damaged beyond repair" (a DBR). This journey we're on is serious business, not a game, though it should also be fun. If we ignore and put off facing situations we don't like and fear, we simply cannot grow. Period. "Evasion prevents insight." We remain the same forever or go downhill.
     Once I worked on a Forest Service lookout tower watching for and reporting fires, the "perfect job." But I still couldn't escape inner pain, as when the Boy Scout leaders moved into my cabin when I was out hiking. And of course, I couldn't escape my wild thoughts and emotions which continued their relentless attacks. (Fortunately, at this critical juncture, I found Vernon Howard, and left for a much wider view.)
     Like the people who move to another country because of dissatisfaction here, the self-exiles think they will find a place where there is no discord; where their inner disquiet will disappear and they’ll have no more problems. This is nonsense but we fool ourselves so easily.
     We must grow up and face reality. There is no "place" we can go to escape as long as the false self lives there. The only possible real solution, the true Great Escape, is to leave the old unregenerated nature behind. The entrenched ego wants nothing to do with being replaced, so it fights fiercely to never be empty and quiet.
     The process is like a polluted glass of water which must be emptied completely before pure water can fill it. So, when we panic and want to run away and fill the false self up again with more of itself, more "me," we must say NO! ten thousand times, fifty thousand times. Then the ego gradually fades away. This is the way to lose the self in order to find the Self.
     The solution to suffering from evasion is to see what is wrong and stop right there. To quietly watch the compulsion to run from the truth, while doing nothing to save yourself. This is right action or call it the power of inaction, which is actually much harder than impulsive “doing.” Just seeing. Vernon said, "Do not fear seeing your mechanical behavior, for you are opening the door to conscious action" (1500 Ways to Escape the Human Jungle, # 1144).
     At that instant we can catch a glimpse of the real Self, the kingdom of heaven within, and know from ourselves there is a God. I don't have to desperately plead for help but only know that heavenly help is there waiting for me to stop running away from the Light.